reflecting-mom to be

as the birth of my daughter is imminent i've been reflecting on what my life has been so far.
the past has been coming forward, as it does from time to time.
complications of the layers, overlapping lives, adventures
my image of me, or what people see, have seen

bad girl:
tattoos and piercings, vixen, parties,
underground, hidden, stubborn, strong, blunt
fierce eyes

shy girl:
quiet, soft spoken, sweet, gentle
domestic, baking, sewing, love
it takes time to know her

sad girl:
wanting connection, lonely, desperately sad, insecure
crying, sleepless nights, aching, lost, old
sad eyes

smart girl:
reading, listening, questioning, thinking, observing, debating
education, always learning, open, world wise, funny, strong
bright

professional lady:
dedicated, organized, knowledgeable, talented, experienced, research
artsy, calm
adult

adventurous girl:
travels, takes lovers, explores, takes risks
wanderlust, not settling down, moving, changes
in and out of control of her life

Soon I am to be a mother. In fact I feel like a mother now. I wonder what my selves will be when I am always responsible for another person? I can feel myself changing and finally it seems I am more a woman than a girl. Oh I've been a woman for a long time but maybe not as much an adult as I could be. As all mothers do I want to protect my daughter from the hardships I've experienced. I want for her to know the joys I've known as well, and to be an innocent child for longer than I was.